Mens Guide

The Sacred Invitation: Honoring Female Energy

To be invited inside a woman’s body is one of the greatest honors a man can receive.
It is not a right — it is an initiation.
When a woman opens to you, she is offering access not only to her body, but to her sacred energy, her life force, and the deepest essence of creation itself.

Her body is a living temple — soft yet powerful, vulnerable yet vast. Every one of us entered this world through the gateway of a woman’s body. That alone deserves reverence.

Sex is not just a physical act; it is a merging of energies. When you enter her, you are entering a field of intelligence that feels everything — your thoughts, your emotions, your intentions. Her body listens. Her tissues remember.

Do not release your rage, shame, or numbness into her. She is not the vessel for your unprocessed pain.
Instead, meet her with presence. Let your touch be a prayer. Bring your heart, your breath, your grounded masculinity.
Offer her your strength, your tenderness, your willingness to love.

When a woman feels safe in your presence, her body becomes a universe — responsive, creative, infinite.
You don’t need to understand her mysteries. You only need to honor them.

For generations, men have been taught to claim, conquer, or consume the feminine rather than to revere her. Many simply didn’t know another way. But awakening as a man means remembering that your power is not in domination — it is in devotion.

The new masculine is not afraid to feel.
He can be strong and still gentle.
He can hold space without needing to control.
He can enter a woman not to take, but to co-create something sacred.

To meet the feminine fully, you must also meet yourself — your grief, your fear, your longing to be seen. The parts you’ve buried under pride, performance, or silence are the very keys to your freedom.

Rise, not as a warrior who conquers, but as a man who remembers.
Stand tall in your body. Breathe into your heart. Soften where you’ve been hard, and let your presence become the gift.

Brother, when you honor the woman, you honor life itself.
She is the earth that receives you.
You are the seed that brings new life to her soil.
Together, you are creation in motion — love made real through two bodies remembering the sacred.

The Sacred Invitation: A Woman’s Message to Men

1. Entering the Temple

To be welcomed into a woman’s body is one of life’s highest honors.
It is not a right — it is an initiation.
When she opens to you, she is offering access to her essence, her life force, and the mystery of creation itself.

“Her body is not something to conquer — it is a temple to be entered in reverence.”

2. Her Body Remembers

Her body is intelligent. It listens. It feels everything.
Every touch, thought, and emotion leaves an imprint.
When you enter her, you are entering a field of consciousness that receives you completely.

“Her tissues remember — she feels what words cannot express.”

3. Energy Exchange

Sex is never just physical.
It is an energetic communion — an exchange that can either nourish or deplete, awaken or wound.
Your presence, intention, and integrity shape that experience far more than your technique.

4. Presence Over Performance

She does not need your performance.
She longs for your presence.
For you to be here — fully, breath by breath — not chasing release, but expanding connection.

“When you are truly present, her body becomes a universe that opens in safety and trust.”

5. What Not to Bring

Do not use her body as a dumping ground for unprocessed pain.
She cannot alchemize your rage or shame for you.
What you do not face within yourself will be felt within her.
Instead, enter her with clarity, devotion, and love.

6. The Devotional Masculine

Devotion is not weakness.
It is the deepest expression of masculine strength.
To be devoted is to meet her power with consciousness, to merge without losing yourself, to hold without grasping.

“The awakened masculine does not take — he offers.”

7. Healing the Divide

For too long, men have been conditioned to possess the feminine rather than revere her.
But a new era calls — one where men lead with the heart and anchor love in the body.
To meet a woman deeply, you must first meet yourself.

Explore your own shadows:
The fear of rejection.
The rage of not being seen.
The ache of disconnection.
Bring light to these places — they are where your true strength lives.

8. Remember Who You Are

You are not separate from the feminine — you are born of her.
When you honor her, you honor the source of life itself.
Stand tall in your body. Breathe from your heart.
Soften your belly. Ground your spine.
Let your presence be the medicine.

“She is the earth that receives you.
You are the seed that gives her life.
Together, you are creation in motion.”

Confidence Is What’s Left When You Stop Betraying Yourself

Confidence isn’t a trick, a technique, or a louder voice than everyone else in the room. It’s not something you “fake until you make.”

Confidence is a nervous system in alignment. It’s your body and mind running the same program without leaks.

And here’s the truth: you already had it.

When you were four, you were wild and free—running naked through the living room, convinced you could fly, utterly unbothered by what anyone thought of you. That was your factory setting. Pure aliveness. Pure trust in yourself.

Then came the drip-feed of training:
“Don’t embarrass yourself.”
“Tone it down.”
“Be good.”

Piece by piece, the confident child got buried under compliance. The nervous system learned to scan for approval, to compare, to rank people as “above me” or “in charge.”

But comparison collapses the nervous system. It spikes cortisol, shuts down decision-making, and accelerates aging. The irony? The people you’re placing above you are usually just better at hiding their own mess.

Demolition Before Construction

Real confidence is 90% demolition—burning down the crap that clogs your system—and only 10% learning something new.

Every ounce of pretending is an assault on your nervous system. Pretending to like people you don’t. Pretending to be fine when you’re not. Pretending to enjoy what you don’t. Pretending to be “safe” and “cool.”

Your brain knows. It doesn’t have a vomit reflex, so instead it rings the alarm of the anterior cingulate cortex, your built-in error detector. That’s why you feel tired. Not because life is hard, but because you’re lying to yourself all day.

Confidence begins the moment you stop betraying yourself.

Fire the Committee

Picture this:
Inside your head is a long boardroom table. You sit at the end, but the seats are filled with everyone whose opinions you’ve let run your life.

Before making a move, you scan the room: “Are you all okay with this?”

That’s not confidence. That’s permission-seeking.

The work is to fire the committee. Burn the boardroom. Let yourself be the only vote that matters.

The Nervous System of Truth

Confidence isn’t about volume. It’s about cleanliness.
It’s the congruence between your inner world and your outer actions.

Truth is the nuclear power source of confidence—not brutal honesty that bulldozes others, but the clean alignment of:

Saying it as it is
Without betraying yourself
Without shitting on other people’s humanity

That’s the difference between dropping the mask and dropping your standards.

Practices for the Week Ahead

This isn’t about “acting confident.”
It’s about daily removal of friction.

Each day, peel away one thing that makes you check in with the committee:

One comparison
One approval-seeking move
One little lie you tell yourself

Do that, and your system will recalibrate toward truth. Confidence will return not as something you build, but as what’s left when the pretending burns away.

The Only Approval That Matters

From now on, cut your approval list to two people:

You, right now.
You, at 80 years old.

Delete the scoreboard. Stop tracking who’s superior. Quit reading micro-expressions like it’s your job. Walk into every room as if you built the whole place—because on a nervous system level, you did.

Confidence is your natural frequency. It’s not about being louder or better.
It’s about being clean.

When the Old Voices Pipe Up

Your ego will protest. You’ll hear things like:

“That won’t work for me.”
“I already know this stuff.”
“It’s just who I am.”
“My family won’t like it if I change.”
“That’s easy for you to say.”

Whenever one of those voices pops up, smile and say out loud:
“That’s adorable.”

Because that voice isn’t your enemy. It’s your inner child—still trying to protect you with outdated armor. Honor it. And then do the right thing anyway.

The ST of Confidence

Confidence isn’t a skill to master. It’s a body-truth to return to.

It’s what remains when you stop betraying yourself, stop rehearsing failure, stop hiding behind masks.

It’s the flow of your nervous system when you are no longer at war with who you are.

And in that flow—you don’t just walk into the room as if you belong.
You walk in as if you built the whole place.

✨ ST practice prompt:
This week, notice every moment you feel the urge to edit yourself for approval. Instead of giving in, pause. Take a breath. Say, “That’s adorable.” Then choose the truer move.

Is It Love or Just the Rush? When an Affair Feels Like a New Beginning

In my counselling room recently, a man sat across from me, twisting his wedding ring absentmindedly. He was here because of a choice he couldn’t seem to make: should he leave his wife and build a new life with another woman — his best mate’s wife — or should he end the affair and attempt to repair the marriage he’s quietly dismantling?

On paper, he called it “weighing up his options.”

In reality, he was wrestling with the difference between love and lust, between a genuine new connection and the adrenaline rush of secrecy.

The Web of Impact

Affairs are not isolated events. They are relational earthquakes, sending aftershocks through every life they touch.

In his case, the affair had already torn the fabric of two marriages — even though only four people knew about it. His wife was still unaware, going about her life, caring for their children, and trusting him implicitly. His mate — the other woman’s husband — had no idea his friend was sharing his bed and his trust.

The fallout was already set in motion:

His wife’s life would be split open by a truth she didn’t ask for and couldn’t prepare for. The children’s lives would be changed forever, as the foundation of their family cracked. His friend would lose not only his marriage but also a deep male friendship. The other woman’s children would face the same disorientation.

The Unseen Sacrifice of His Wife

This is where the story stings even deeper.

When a woman marries and has children, she often — consciously or unconsciously — reorganises her entire life around the family. She may step back from her own career, from personal passions, from independence, so her husband can lead professionally, provide financially, and live with the security of her support.

She gives her time, her body, her emotional labour. She invests in the home, the children’s wellbeing, and his stability — all on the unspoken agreement that this partnership is mutual, loyal, and safe.

An affair, especially one of this nature, is not just about sex. It is a profound rupture of that agreement. It says, “I will take what you give, but I will also take from somewhere else, without telling you.”

The Betrayal That Has Already Happened

Some people mistakenly believe the betrayal begins when the spouse finds out. It doesn’t.

The moment the affair began — the very first time a boundary was crossed — the marriage was altered. Trust had been silently replaced with deception. He had already destroyed the integrity of the relationship, even if she was still smiling at him over the dinner table.

Why So Little Compassion?

From the outside, it can seem shocking that someone in his position has so little visible empathy for the people he’s hurting. In session, this often comes down to compartmentalisation — the mental trick of putting the affair in one box, the marriage in another, and not letting the two connect emotionally.

In the affair, he feels alive, seen, and desired. In his marriage, he feels the weight of responsibility and history.

If he let himself fully consider the pain he is causing — not just to his wife, but to the children, the friend, and the other woman’s family — the guilt would be unbearable. So he doesn’t.

Instead, he frames his dilemma as a romantic decision, as though it were only about which woman to choose, ignoring that the question is no longer about choice but about accountability.

The Truth He Needs to Face

The affair is not happening in a vacuum. It is a chain reaction with deep emotional casualties. And no matter what decision he makes next — whether to stay or to leave — the consequences will remain.

In reality, the question isn’t, “Should I leave my wife for this other woman?”

The real question is, “Am I willing to face the full cost of what I’ve done and take responsibility for repairing the damage, whether or not the marriage survives?”

Until he confronts that truth, the affair will not just be a secret — it will be an ongoing act of harm.

The Currency of Sexual Energy

Amazon review of The Currency of Sexual Energy

5.0 out of 5 stars Verified Purchase Must Read! Reviewed in the United States on 4 June 2013

I first became aware of the topic of sexual transmutation through Napoleon Hill’s “Think And Grow Rich”.

Although I could somewhat see and understand the concept, I didn’t exactly “get it”. I would research on the internet for more info but none of it really helped clarify much. It just seemed like people said to “Stop masturbating.”, “Find creative outlets.”, etc.

All of that is true, but is not the actual sexual transmutation itself. They are just the “tools” in a way. You can focus all your energy and intent on the tools, but still not transmute anything. You’ll still be sexually frustrated and possibly even cause more harm than good.

This book helped clarify what exactly sexual transmutation truly is and in a very simple and straight forward way. I really like how the author just writes in a very casual almost conversational way. You can tell she is speaking straight from the heart and with pure love.

Like the other reviewer wrote… it is free of all scientific and spiritual jargon. There is a little bit on the topic of brainwaves such as alpha, theta, beta, but that’s pretty much all. There is also quotes from the Tao Te Ching but they are all only references to help explain or express what the author is trying to say.

It’s also aimed more towards the male gender. I believe pretty much at least 75% of the book is about how to channel your sexual energy instead of expelling it through ejaculation (Hint: Ejaculation, not masturbation).

However, that is not to say that women won’t benefit at all from reading this. They will learn a lot about why men are the way they are when it comes to sexual matters. Haha.

All in all… this book has pretty much explained all that I was looking for to know about the topic of sexual transmutation and I really see no need to search any further for more info. The hard part now is actually incorporating and acting upon the wisdom learned.

The only bad thing i’d have to point out about the book is that there are quite a few typos in it. That’s all. It’s not so extreme that you can’t understand what is trying to be said, but I just had to put it out there for people to know. It pales in comparison to the knowledge and information contained within though!

The Currency of Sexual Energy can be purchased only online ebook form following this link- The Currency of Sexual Energy

Porn isn’t the issue

Out of control porn habits aren’t something you need to think “I need to quit porn” that’s not the right way to think about it.

The right way is “how to have a better relationship, a better sex life, a better life”

No porn isn’t the issue. The real issue is how you are showing up in your relationships.

How is porn hurting you…

How is porn minimising you…

How is it making you ashamed and socially isolated…

How is porn affecting your relationship and or your relating to women and other people…

How does porn affect the way you show up in the bedroom…

Are you treating your partner like a porn actor and just banging away unconsciously or are you tuning in to what they actually desire and what actually turns them on and not what you think turns them on according to porn or even worse just focusing on what turns you on as seen on porn videos?

Stopping porn is not just kicking an addiction it is cleaning up your mindset and your psyche, it’s changing the energy you carry with you into a room, into a relationship, into a new job.

The solution is simple: You need a vision of life that is more compelling than porn and a vision that frightens you to motivate change. You need both.

What would your life be like in 3 years time if you took care of yourself and loved yourself like your life depends on it?

What would your life be like in 3 years if you took care of your relationship and loved your partner like your life depended on it?

Write for 20 minutes what your life would be like if you got you act together – write about the hell you could be in if you didn’t.

Write down everything that you think could be bad about porn and what it’s doing to you?

Here is one common scary side effect that no one wants to experience or talk about – ERECTILE DYSFUNCTION

What women want…

Women no longer are looking for their “Knight in shining armour”. They have discovered that once ‘snagged’ that knight takes on a parenting role….. big turn off! Women are no longer satisfied with putting up with the feminine mystique that once abounded in our mothers era. Women no longer wish their spirit to be tamed and owned by a man.

Although … they will give you their heart and soul if you know how to take care of hers.

Our mothers had little choice and little resources available to them to explore their potential as forces of power in society. It was ‘safer’ to find a good husband and be supported guided by that ‘good husband’ even if the wife had gainful employment.

So what are women looking for these days? (consciously or subconsciously) The desire is DESIRE. Women desire someone they can desire and be desired by. Women are discovering that they actually have more power over their life than they imagined and much more power than their mothers ever dreamed of. Women want to be able to follow and achieve their desires and not just romantic desires. Women are looking for a change in culture.

Women are finding out they actually have …..

…..erotic power….

A women’s erotic power is not in her seductiveness and her skill, beauty and deliciousness that turns men heads and gains wolf whistles. It is not in the sleekness of her instagram posts that gain lots of likes and followers. It is not in her body shape, her bra size, her anatomy of her clitoris in relationship to her vagina.

Erotic power is the ability to tap into a life force. This life force is a source of not only a powerful energy, it is also a source of creativity, intuition and confidence.

A woman does not actually need a man to tap into her erotic power although it makes the journey so much sweeter and can magnify her desire and cultivation of her own sexual energy.

The quickest way to take beauty from a flower is to pick it and put it in a vase for you to admire as your own. Just like flowers women are wild and they blossom when admired in their natural environment. They love the sensation of your nose coming closer to smell their essence. They love your words and admiration describing their beauty.

They wilt when you pick them and try to arrange them in your vase for your pleasure. No matter how many changes of fresh water and admiring words, the flower will wilt and die. Yes it was going to anyway out in the field, but it’s life is shortened in a vase.

The vase is a container of conformity designed to keep the flower in its ‘place’ in society. The flower arrangement is a set standard of how you wish the flower to present for yourself and for others to admire.

The vase limits the flowers freedom, it’s energy and it’s natural cycles that are closely tied to the sun and moon.

Similarly, dolphins and killer whales who are kept in captivity display signs of their fin, which is usually upright, starting to droop. The theory is that in captivity their strength is diminished. The dolphin and the killer whale need space to flow with thier desires.

Flowers wilt in captivity and dolphins fins ‘wilt’ in captivity. Can you see the parallel here with women in relationships that have the energy of ownership and containment?

Women need space for their desire to grow and to be expressed. She needs freedom and space to explore what ‘grows’ her and what nourishes her.

So what do women want from you?

………to love and support her erotic power. Freedom to express her erotic nature without your insecurity or judgment. She wants you to tap into your Eros, your sexual energy, your creative genius so that you can flow together, side by side in sensuality.

She wants you to receive her, just as she is, in whatever emotional flow she is in, knowing that her rage, her fury, her disgust will be met with the open strong hands of her ‘Eros’ waiting for her to melt once more when the storm passes.

She doesn’t want your containment, she doesn’t want to to rescue her or to fix things for her. She wants your desire, she wants to express her desire for you, she wants you to share your deepest desires and feel safe enough to share hers with you.

She wants your sensuality, the fullness of your masculine to slide up against her softness, her engorged desire for you…..

She wants to make magick….. with you.

She doesn’t expect you to understand her or her magick. She wants you to enjoy her magick and the fruits of it. She wants to express her deep feminine nature, her feminine power, her sensuality on the beautiful open, receiving canvas of her man.

She wants to flow…. she wants to be in flow at her own pace…

She doesn’t get excited by to do lists or instruction manuals or rule books. This is what a ‘good girl’ adheres to. This is what the dolphin in captivity is trained to do. To jump through hoops and perform for another’s enjoyment. The dolphin looks like it is having fun ….. but have you actually seen dolphins in the wild? They don’t need to be trained to have fun. Their nature is to jump and somersault and dance in the waves.

“Good girls” are not ‘turned on girls’.

She gets excited by being in the moment, she gets excited when she is in her ‘Femme Fatale’. She wants to live from her ‘turn on’…. from her free spirit, from the wild dolphin spirit within her.

She wants to be immune to the stress and hustle of the materialistic world because she has seen and experienced something beyond this. If she has known orgasm and sensuality then she knows that there is another realm of being. An altered state that can be accessed only from fully inhabiting her sensuality and it is here she has access to her erotic genius.

yes yes yes….

are you brave enough to partake in her magick?